Our Little Nicholas

A Cesarean Section, like any other surgical procedures is a risky operation. It is a procedure in which incisions are made through an expecting Mom’s abdomen and uterus to deliver her baby.

I was both disappointed and frightened when I learned I will be having my Cesarean Section today if my baby’s heart rate monitoring will come out unsuccessful. If Little Nico’s heart rate will be fine though, I’ll be having the operation on Monday just to give me two days to wait for a possible normal delivery. I was shocked to learn about it yesterday that I walked from the hospital to the boarding house (I don’t know, maybe about 2 kilometers or so?). I left the hospital about 430PM and reached home at 6PM, completely unaware of what I just did, I was not expecting the sudden turn of events.

I know I should not think negatively about it, that I should think it’s for the safety of Little Nico. I just can’t help having a sleepless night though. My mind was filled with morbid and unpleasant thoughts. I was terrified and I ended up scolding myself for being so negative. Then my thoughts wander to more senseless and unproductive direction and sleep has been so elusive.

I was confident I can deliver my 8-pounder angel, but my doctor countered my confidence when she showed me my very low fluid level and when I almost cried out when she did an IE to me, proving that I haven’t dilated yet and my cervix is so closed. We cannot risk losing more fluid and wait for a normal delivery when little Nico is still enjoying his floating moments and doesn’t want to go down. So it’s a CS delivery then.

I was thinking about the complications that a Cesarean Section will cause me. I will be at risk for infection and increased blood loss. My bowel functions will also decrease and I might suffer respiratory complications. And I got so agitated that I will have to stay 3-5 days in the hospital because of it and may have to wait 4-6 weeks to fully recover from the pain of the incision. But what really hurt me most are th possible risks that the operation may bring to my little angel. It may cause him breathing problems, a low Apsgar score, distress or maybe even injury. No wonder I haven’t had an hour of sleep last night.

But I feel alright now. I talked to God this morning. I prayed and prayed to God for Him to deliver us safe from any harm or danger. And I know God will not fail me. He gave me Baby Nico as a gift. I’m sure He will allow me to nurture His most precious gift… the gift of life.

Tomorrow, November 28, 2008, Mommy and I will know our Induction of labor schedule. Yes, Mommy will go through a “forced” labor next week. It’s a choice she doesn’t really relish since she always wanted to have a natural labor.

Others see induction of labor as unethical – something that’s going against God’s plan. But that isn’t so. You see, Mommy doesn’t intend to precede God’s timeline. We know that I will be at my “ripest” for picking on the 11^th of December. But I have to be outside of Mommy’s tummy as early as December 1. Why? Read on.

Induction of labor is an obstetrical process that allows the initiation of labor before it begins on its own accord. Yes, it seems unnatural for many because the best way to go into labor is of course to wait until the baby’s ready and wants to go out on his own. But Mommy has been reading all about this process since that “Water-breaking-scare” last November 15. Mommy knows this is a legitimate process and is not breaking any law. It is even often necessary when complications arrive and Mommies and babies have to be saved from a dangerous pregnancy.

There are actually so many reasons for inducing labor. One of which is parent’s choice. Yes, parent’s have the choice if they want to deliver early due to some domestic situations that could somehow justify a safely timed induction. This is legitimate as long as the Mommy passes the following requirements – Mommy is within one week of her due date, and her cervix is “ripe” for induction. A ripe cervix is determined through its dilation, thinning and measurement from the baby’s head. These requirements are important so the doctor won’t have to fight a stubborn anatomy and thus increasing the risk of a Cesarean Section.

Another is for health reasons. A common indication to induce labor is Pre-eclampsia. Another is when the baby’s growth inside the tummy is slowing and is worrisome; it might be better for him to continue growing outside his Mommy’s womb. Also, a baby who’s overstaying inside Mommy’s tummy should also be induced to save him from fetal distress. Another could be early breaking of water. – That’s what happened to Mommy.

Mommy’s doctor told her it’s actually a race against infection. Mommy’s taking

antibiotics for days now. Just to make sure no infection can take over that would worsen the complication. Unfortunately for Mommy though, induction should be done to her whether or not she passes the induction requirements. Therefore, Mommy’s at risk for

failure to dilate and may go on a C-Section. This worries Mom so much; not only because it is more expensive but also because she doesn’t want to be “weak” for a longer time. She wants her energy back right after delivery so she can take care of me right then and there. But well, Mommy knows a CS is not the worst thing that could happen. Due to her condition, it’s just a second choice for her. But poor Mommy, she’ll be in much pain when the doctor finds her “unripe” for labor. It will be a very long drawn affair and it may wear out my Mom! And then there’s the possibility of CS looming around her. Mommy doesn’t want to be stressed out during labor. She should be relaxed right?

But on top of all these worries and complications, Mommy is still positive everything will turn out right with the Father’s guidance. God is just a prayer away, Mommy always tell me that. Surely, He won’t neglect Mommy and her little angel…